It’s Official: Ignorance is Strength

After having successfully evaded his own responsibilities associated with the failure of intelligence vis a vis Iraq and its non-possession of weapons of mass-destruction (for which the President was rewarded with reelection, Incompetetentalleezza Rice was elevated to the post of Secretary of State, her deputy Stephen “Yellowcakes” Hadley elevated to National Security Advisor, former CIA Director George “Slamdunk” Tenet was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom and Deputy Secretary of State Paul Wolfowitz was universally praised and now made head of the World Bank), the President continued to heap lavish praise on the commission he anointed to make findings as to pre-war intelligence failures, particularly since not a single intelligence failure appears to have involved him.
Commenting that he successfully invaded Iraq on the strength of pure faith and emotion and with no actually correct intelligence whatsoever, the President announced with regret that he was dismissing Jim Towey as Director of the White House Office of Faith Based and Community Initiatives, merging that unit with the National Intelligence Directorate, now headed by John “I Brake for Right Wing Death Squads” Negroponte.
Originally, the President intended to name former Defense Department Official Douglas Feith to the joint position (which he would term “Feith-based initiatives”), but the President said “When it comes to Right Wing Death Squads, John is second to no one.”
Former Secretary of State Colin Powell declined comment, saying “Don’t get me started. Just don’t.”