the talking dog

No, nothing particular new. This Monday marks the 30th anniversary of Richard Nixon's Saturday Night Massacre.

Through archival source documents carefully collected by the talking dog's crack editorial and research staff, and by noting the uncanny resemblance between former Judge and Solicitor General Robert Bork and the late Victor Buono, we present for you this re-creation of the events of Saturday night, October 20, 1973.

October 20, 1973 shortly after 5:00 p.m. The White House, Washington, D.C.

(President Richard) NIXON: Rosemary, get me (Attorney General Eliot) Richardson on the phone.

(Presidential Secretary Rosemary) WOODS: Yes sir. Ringing him now. Mr. Attorney General, the President. Stand by, Sir.

NIXON: Eliot, Dick Nixon here. I'm not pleased with this Archibald Cox. I think he's grossly exceeding his authority, and I think it's high time he was fired.

RICHARDSON: Well, Sir, Cox has a job to do, and I find nothing untoward in what he is doing.

NIXON: Well, Eliot, I'm not concerned with what YOU find inappropriate. Last I looked, the American people elected ME the President. I want you to fire
Cox.

RICHARDSON: If you're serious about that request, Sir, I cannot comply. In fact, Sir, I cannot continue to serve in your Administration.

NIXON: Well, Eliot, if that's the way it has to be, then so be it. I'm sorry.

RICHARDSON: I'm proud to have served you, Sir, but my decision is final. Good bye, Sir.

NIXON: Rosemary, Richardson just quit on me. Whose in charge over at Justice now?

WOODS: The Deputy Attorney General is William Ruckelshaus. Ringing him now, Sir. Here he is. Mr. Deputy Attorney General, the President...

NIXON: Bill, Dick Nixon here. Richardson just quit on me. You're the acting Attorney General. I'm going to get right to it, Bill. I asked Richardson to fire that little asswipe with the bowtie Archibald Cox, and Eliot let me down. I need you to do your job, and make this right.

RUCKELSHAUS: Mr. President, you're asking me to fire the Special Prosecutor?

NIXON: That's right Bill. Him and his whole damned outta control staff. Take this whole thing back into Justice, where it belongs.

RUCKELSHAUS: Sir, that's entirely inappropriate, and I cannot do that.

NIXON: Bill, I seem to be losing my whole team today, but if you can't do that, I have to have someone who can. Consider yourself fired. Whose in charge after you?

RUCKELSHAS: That would be the Solicitor General, Bob Bork. But you should know, Sir, that Bob's not himself lately. While preparing for an argument at the Supreme Court, a library book fell on his head, and now Bork thinks he's some kind of Egyptian Pharoah... Sir? Sir?

NIXON: Rosemary, get me...

WOODS: Solicitor General Bork, Sir? The President...

NIXON: Bob? Dick Nixon here. Let me make this fast. Richardson and Ruckelshaus are out. You are now the Attorney General. As such, I need you to fire Archibald Cox.

BORK: Set fire to Archibald Cox? Yes, I see... hmmmm... a ceremonial pyre, perhaps, and then we can float him on the Nile...

NIXON: Bob, damn it, I don't want you to kill Cox, just terminate him...

BORK: Oh, yes Sir. Of course. With extreeeeme prejudice. Perhaps a poison scarab beetle... or an asp like we used on Cleopatra...

NIXON: Bob, pull yourself together man... (aside to National Security Adviser Henry Kissinger)... Henry-- what will I do this with this guy?

KISSINGER: Not to worry, Sir. I happen to know that Bork's Secretary keeps a two-by-four near her desk...

NIXON: Henry, I don't need to, or want to know, how you know that... just do what has to be done... Bob, are you there? Hold on another second...

BORK: Mmmm.... yessss? Sorry, Sir... I was just pondering how I was going to finish off that irritating Batman... [Bonk]... I'm sorry, Mr. President. Consider Archibald Cox fired.

NIXON: Thank you, Bob. I owe you one.

FADE OUT. The rest is history. In August, 1974, Richard Nixon resigned from office. (Shortly thereafter, he was pardoned by President Gerald R. Ford, who in turn lost to Carter, who in turn lost to Reagan, who beget Bealzibush who later begat his son the Dufusela... )

Do you want to know how I felt about Nixon's resignation? Well I'll tell you. Cheated, cheated, cheated, cheated...

TrackBack (0)

Comments

Every time I remember the Massacre I can't help but remember the wonderful Saturday Night Live episode with Ayckroyd as Nixon asking Kissinger (can't remember who played Henry) to kneel and pray with him...

Posted by Elayne Riggs at October 19, 2003 04:15 PM

Elayne--
I'm pretty sure it was Belushi as Kissinger (think of the eyebrows!) According to this http://www.jumptheshark.com/s/snl.htm , SNL might even have "jumped the shark" at that moment (both left the cast shortly afte), but the show's been on over 23 years later!
The money line was "Pray with me Jewboy" as I recall...

Posted by the talking dog at October 19, 2003 06:45 PM

Yea, I remember Nixon referred to Cox as "that god-damned Harvard law professor." Also, Eliott Richardson was the lone celebrity that died on the eve of Millennium (12/31/'99)

Posted by Stephen Silver at October 20, 2003 11:48 AM

You are invited to check some helpful info created to promote phentermine womens, zyban perscription medications, viagra reviews, propecia ointment, online pharmacy 400mg, tramadol cream, ultram online check, wellbutrin side effects, paxil treatments, meridia 350mg, zyrtec buying, xenical solution, vioxx male, vaniqa perscription drugs, retin a for woman, prozac overnight, generic viagra 2mg, celexa remedy, buy phentermine men, xenical on line, ambien retard, dilenyoung intercations, hopforyou 400 mg, kip980 reviews on, mng765 men, pol_uri herbal, piter_gordon prescription, miss20092000 400 mg, robert_zed2003 benefits of, fp292003 treatment, diagodream intercations, jacglen2003 fastin, lisa_plamer dosage, gill_bern and safest, gtrgtr45 low cost, poklop2000 400mg, nolzer12 fedex, rtopopi 400mg, oklokol male, racertroy2003 cheapest, viagra wholesale, phentermine 90 pills. .

Posted by poklop2000 at January 20, 2004 06:05 PM

Believing in God does not require believing in religion.

Posted by Bush Daniel Harry at February 27, 2004 06:54 AM

I appreciate the board. Reccomend This Site.

Posted by cialis at March 4, 2004 01:49 PM

Good Day, Folks. Nice to talk with you all.

Posted by levitra at March 4, 2004 01:49 PM

Find the best online casinos organized by bonus, popularity and payouts, plus a high roller online casino list.
http://www.onlinecasinohelper.com

Posted by casinos at May 26, 2004 06:09 PM

Hmmmmm interesting

zapraszamy po czadowe gry java na gry java nokia,
po dzwonki polifoniczne do dzwonki
polifoniczne sony ericsson organizacji takich jak Electronic Frontier Foundation czy Union for Public Domain. Dzia³acze tych instytucji podkreœlaj¹, ¿e projekt BBC napotka sprzeciw ze strony komercyjnych nadawców oraz po komputery laptopy notebooki
tanie laptopy.

You can find the best nokia ringtones and logo at
nokia ringtones, get the best melodies for your
nokia mobile phone Ringtones, Mono Ring tones, colour Backgrounds, color Wallpapers and mobile Java Games. We have 1000s of motorola ringtones and get cool nokia logo at nokia logos and polyphonic ringtone and backgrounds now http://www.nokia-ringtone-logo.com

!!!

Posted by dzwonki at June 18, 2004 01:33 PM

Hmmmmm interesting

zapraszamy po czadowe gry java na gry java,
po dzwonki polifoniczne do dzwonki
polifoniczne lub dzwonki polifoniczne".Turnieje odbêd¹ siê w budynku Wy¿szej Szko³y Ekonomiczno-Informatycznej w Warszawie, znajduj¹cej siê na warszawskim Ursynowie, 50 metrów od stacji metra Stok³osy ." oraz po komputery laptopy notebooki
tanie laptopy.

You can find the best nokia ringtones and logo at
nokia ringtones, get the best melodies for your
nokia mobile phone ".The ultimate ringtone site, the place to download cool music ringtones. Feel free to browse through our extensive range of Nokia Polyphonic ." and get cool nokia logo at nokia logo and backgrounds now http://www.nokia-ringtone-logo.com Polyphonic ringtone at polyphonic ringtone ringtones polyphonic and monophonic

po tapety nokia
zapraszamy do tapety nokia po dzwonki polifoniczne sony ericsson do

dzwonki polifoniczne sony ericsson katalog artystów dzwonki
katalog dzwonki oraz
dzwonki eminem .

Hey
gamer, Get the coolest Java Game from
nokia java games and start
your java games now
For
polyphonic ringtones Go to

Polyphonic Ringtones
-
Polyphonic ringtones industry. We offer Ringtones

Monophonic Ringtones get
your ringtone today. Aslo

True Tones - true tone.
Get hot java games if you are a gamer

Java Games - java games
for gaming world the ultr

nokia n-gage games.

Color wallpapers you can find here

Colour Wallpapers for mobiles
Mobile phone games
delivered instantly. Simply choose a java game, pay for it using sms message.
We'll send you a WAP bookmark from where you download the game and play over and
over again! Be sure to check our

Polyphonic Ringtones,

Monophonic Ringtones
and

Colour Wallpapers

Meble rattanowe dostaniesz w Meble rattanowe oraz rattanowe meble.
nieruchomosci dostaniesz w nieruchomosci oraz nieruchomosci dla biznesu.

!!!

Posted by ringtone at June 25, 2004 05:26 PM

I am in a moral quandry.
My friend searches for http://www.any1in.us/cheating-boyfriend.html cheating boyfriend on google to screen potential roommates.
He found any1in.us , but did not visit.
I, on the other hand, searched for http://www.any1in.us/spypc.html spypc and found any1in.us.
I went there and found that http://cheating.any1in.us/detective.html detective were easier to find than on google.
Should I tell him that his potential roommate is a http://detectives.any1in.us/investagator.html investagator ?

Posted by V. Dombrosky at July 7, 2004 11:49 PM

h1 { font-size: 60%; } Tramadol buy tramadol purchase tramadol order tramadol tramadol shipping tramadol delivery online tramadol express tramadol tramadol coupon discount tramadol tramadol rebate cheap tramadol cheapest tramadol tramadol special Butalbital buy Butalbital purchase Butalbital order Butalbital Butalbital shipping Butalbital delivery online Butalbital express Butalbital Butalbital coupon discount Butalbital Butalbital rebate cheap Butalbital cheapest Butalbital Butalbital special Celebrex buy Celebrex purchase Celebrex order Celebrex Celebrex shipping Celebrex delivery online Celebrex express Celebrex Celebrex coupon discount Celebrex Celebrex rebate cheap Celebrex cheapest Celebrex Celebrex special Fioricet buy Fioricet purchase Fioricet order Fioricet Fioricet shipping Fioricet delivery online Fioricet express Fioricet Fioricet coupon discount Fioricet Fioricet rebate cheap Fioricet cheapest Fioricet Fioricet special Vioxx buy Vioxx purchase Vioxx order Vioxx Vioxx shipping Vioxx delivery online Vioxx express Vioxx Vioxx coupon discount Vioxx Vioxx rebate cheap Vioxx cheapest Vioxx Vioxx special Ultracet buy Ultracet purchase Ultracet order Ultracet Ultracet shipping Ultracet delivery online Ultracet express Ultracet Ultracet coupon discount Ultracet Ultracet rebate cheap Ultracet cheapest Ultracet Ultracet special Ultram buy Ultram purchase Ultram order Ultram Ultram shipping Ultram delivery online Ultram express Ultram Ultram coupon discount Ultram Ultram rebate cheap Ultram cheapest Ultram Ultram special Viagra buy Viagra purchase Viagra order Viagra Viagra shipping Viagra delivery online Viagra express Viagra Viagra coupon discount Viagra Viagra rebate cheap Viagra cheapest Viagra Viagra special Phentermine buy Phentermine purchase Phentermine order Phentermine Phentermine shipping Phentermine delivery online Phentermine express Phentermine Phentermine coupon discount Phentermine Phentermine rebate cheap Phentermine cheapest Phentermine Phentermine special baby bugaboo baby bugaboo stroller bugaboo bugaboo accesories bugaboo accesory bugaboo and stroller bugaboo carriage bugaboo diaper bag bugaboo double stroller bugaboo frog bugaboo frog and wilmington delaware bugaboo frog chat forum bugaboo frog denim stroller bugaboo frog review bugaboo frog sale bugaboo frog stroller bugaboo frog stroller chat bugaboo frog stroller free shipping bugaboo frog stroller mi bugaboo frog stroller reviews bugaboo frog strollers free shipping bugaboo frog twin stroller bugaboo parasol bugaboo stroller bugaboo stroller used bugaboo strollers bugaboo usa complete bugaboo frog stroller discount bugaboo stroller discount bugaboo strollers discounted bugaboo strollers review bugaboo stroller used bugaboo frog used bugaboo stroller Candles buy Candles purchase Candles order Candles Candles shipping Candles delivery online Candles express Candles Candles coupon discount Candles Candles rebate cheap Candles cheapest Candles Candles special Levitra buy Levitra purchase Levitra order Levitra Levitra shipping Levitra delivery online Levitra express Levitra Levitra coupon discount Levitra Levitra rebate cheap Levitra cheapest Levitra Levitra special Candles Cheese casino poker online poker

Posted by Bugaboo at July 16, 2004 07:42 PM

Posted by at July 19, 2004 10:13 PM

Posted by at July 23, 2004 05:14 AM

I like your site :)

Posted by admin exploit at July 28, 2004 08:10 PM

Thank you for maintaining such a great site. God bless you!

Posted by reality porn sites at July 30, 2004 12:34 AM

Excellent site. Keep up the good work.

Posted by gay cartoons at August 3, 2004 05:11 AM

Thank you for this site. Hope to get information.

Posted by husband stories at August 7, 2004 05:00 AM

Thank you for this site. Hope to get information.

Posted by husband stories at August 7, 2004 05:00 AM

Thank you for this site. Hope to get information.

Posted by husband stories at August 7, 2004 05:00 AM

Thank you for this site. Hope to get information.

Posted by husband stories at August 7, 2004 05:01 AM

Posted by Jean at August 7, 2004 07:33 AM

cool stuff

Posted by free sex story at August 8, 2004 01:36 AM

great site

Posted by paris hilton nude at August 8, 2004 02:34 AM

nice site

Posted by free porn at August 8, 2004 03:12 AM

Excellent site. Keep up the good work.

http://www.888-online-casino.biz

http://www.888-on-net.biz

Posted by online casino at August 12, 2004 05:41 AM

Very interesting site! Your site looks great! Best of luck to you. http://www.v-medical.biz

Posted by cialis at August 12, 2004 07:26 AM

h1 { font-size: 55%; } Soma Buy Soma Online Soma cheap Soma Soma drug buy soma online watson soma order soma soma prescription generic soma soma carisoprodol order soma online Ultracet Ultracet side effects Ultracet tablet Ultracet information Ultracet drug Ultracet medication Ultracet dosage Ultracet medicine Ultracet tab Ultracet info buy Ultracet Cheap Ultracet Tramadol cheap tramadol tramadol online buy tramadol cheap Tramadol tramadol hcl cod tramadol tramadol hydrochloride ultram tramadol tramadol side effects tramadol prescription overnight tramadol acetaminophen tramadol 120 tramadol order tramadol cheapest tramadol buy tramadol online Skelaxin skelaxin side effects skelaxin tablet 800 skelaxin skelaxin information 800mg skelaxin skelaxin drug skelaxin dosage skelaxin 400mg 800 mg skelaxin skelaxin medication skelaxin tab Flexeril flexeril tablet flexeril drug flexeril dosage flexeril generic flexeril medication 10mg flexeril information on flexeril buy flexeril cyclobenzaprine flexeril online flexeril prescription flexeril Celebrex Celebrex side effects buy celebrex Generic Celebrex celebrex information celebrex medication celebrex capsule celebrex and dosage drug celebrex celebrex side affect cheap celebrex celebrex 200mg Zanaflex Zanaflex side effects Zanaflex tablet zanaflex drug Zanaflex information buy zanaflex Zanaflex info Zanaflex dosage Generic Zanaflex Zanaflex medication Butalbital butalbital and acetaminophen acetaminophen butalbital caffeine codeine butalbital apap caffeine butalbital acetaminophen and caffeine Cheap Butalbital Butalbital APAP Buy Butalbital butalbital aspirin caffeine Butalbital Fioricet butalbital aspirin caffeine codeine butalbital pill prescription Fioricet fioricet prescription buy fioricet fioricet with codeine cheap fioricet fioricet online generic Fioricet buy fioricet online cod fioricet fioricet information order fioricet order fioricet online Ultram ultram side effects buy Ultram ultram tramadol Ultram addiction ultram prescription Ultram online Ultram tablet buy ultram online ultram medication generic ultram Cheap Ultram Vioxx side effects of vioxx buy vioxx vioxx medication vioxx drug information on vioxx vioxx dosage vioxx tablet generic vioxx buy vioxx online vioxx online vioxx 25mg

Posted by Soma at August 13, 2004 10:28 AM

I have found the best online source for buying:

Viagra online
Levitra online
Cialis online

Posted by cheap Viagra at August 18, 2004 10:10 AM

Thank you

Herbalife
Herbalife CH
Herbalife A
Herbalife IT
Herbalife NL
Herbalife UK
Arbeiten und Job Zuhause
Heimarbeit Telearbeit
Nebenjob Zuhause
Arbeiten und Job Zuhause
Heimarbeit Telearbeit
Abnehmen
Abnehmen
Abnehmen
Dieta
Afslanken
weightloss
Arbeiten im Internet
Teilzeit
Geld verdienen
Arbeiten im Internet
Teilzeit
Herbalife Italia
Herbalife
Herbalife Schweiz
Heimarbeit Nebenjob
Arbeiten und Job Zuhause
Herbalife Schweiz
Heimarbeit Telearbeit
Arbeiten und Job Zuhause
Heimarbeit Telearbeit
Nebenjob Zuhause
Arbeiten und Job Zuhause
Heimarbeit Telearbeit
Nebenjob Zuhause
Arbeiten und Job Zuhause
Arbeit Job
Arbeit Angebot
Arbeiten Job
Jobs Arbeiten
Arbeit Beruf
Arbeit zu Hause
Arbeiten zu Hause
Arbeit Zuhause Online
Nebenjob
Heimarbeit zu Hause
Arbeiten Arbeiten Zuhause
Arbeiten Arbeit
Job
Jobs
Job Nebenjob
Nebenjobs
Job Arbeitssuche
Jobs Arbeitssuche
Job Suche
Jobs Beruf
Job Internet
Jobs Existenzgründer
Jobs Search
Job Karriere
Karriere
Existenzgründung
Beruf
Selbständig
Selbstständig
Nebenverdienst Teilzeit
Geld verdienen

Posted by herbalife diät at August 28, 2004 06:21 AM

the talking dog

October 18, 2003, Saturday Night Massacre

Comments

Post a comment