Deadeye Dick Career Death-watch (and contest!)?

The Vice-President broke his half-week long silence today by giving a statement in the friendly confines of Fox News to Brit Hume… Cheney admitted that it was his own damned fault that he shot his good friend Harry Whittington, and Cheney noted that he had “a beer with lunch”. This is the clearest confirmation possible that there indeed was at least some level of alcohol involved, and hence, there was significance in the fact that local law enforcement officials were kept at bay until the following morning. “One beer” of course could be a 12 ounce can, a pint glass, a quart bottle, a keg… unfortunately, the veep wasn’t more forthcoming on that little pint point.
Obviously, the Administration has some uses for the Cheney fiasco, such as covering up for the fact that the Senate GOP majority may be tiring of any kind of inquiry into possible abuses and the certain illegality associated with the NSA domestic eavesdropping “program”. Or, the shorter version, “Olympia Snowe has been threatened with a primary challenge and doesn’t think she can win both it and the general election, so if tyranny is the way it is, well it’s better than being voted out of office.”
Notwithstanding that, the Vice-President did a number of really dumb things with this. For one thing, he showed us that he engages in incredibly reckless activities. The fact of the matter is, it could well have been Harry blasting him full of metal pellets, and no Secret Service agent is likely fast enough to intervene when the veep has arranged a private party in a remote area involving elderly participants, fire-arms… and alcohol…
Then he screws around with letting anyone know about this, in such a manner as sure making it look like interfering with a local investigation (can you say “obstruction of justice”?) Then, politically, his silence allowed some really stupid activity, like JEB and McLellan mocking the victim, even as he was having a heart attack as a result of having been shot in the chest. Worst of all, Mr. Scaife and his minions have turned “the press” from being about “the public’s right to know” into “the public’s right to be entertained”… i.e., Dick has just handed the press the Bush Administration’s Monica-gate story and Chappaquiddick rolled into one. For no God damned reason, other than he was embarassed about having a beer (albeit possibly a rather large one). There is no law against hunting while sloshed in Texas that anyone knows of, so… it’s more about embarassment (and possible negligent homicide had poor Harry not pulled through, though it looks like he will…)
Coming off a week when it was disclosed that Scooter revealed that Dick ordered him to leak damaging classified information to try to burn both Plame and Wilson, let’s just say… Dick’s stock hasn’t exactly been soaring …
We’ll see. This whole overreaction to a little huntin’ accident… I mean, come on, Dick. Do you really think Al Qaeda wants to see your sensitive side? (The line of the day is from Vermont Senator Pat Leahy, who suggested that given that Cheney told him to go f*** himself, “I guess I got off easy.”)
Anyway… before Fitzgerald maybe indicts or something, this might be an excellent time to consider stepping aside “for health reasons”. “Family reasons” will certainly do, as will “personal reasons.” For those who guess closest to Dick’s last day in office, a special prize is in order (lunch at some 4-star restaurant in NYC, my treat, or in “your town” assuming I ever get there? How ’bout that one…); bonus points for guessing the reason Dick gives. Of course, sitting where I do, I’ll take “January 20, 2009” as the safest bet…
But that dream scenario (for some) of having Condi step up to the vice-presidency, where she would be the automatic frontrunner for the GOP’s candidate for president in 2008, might have just started in motion… We’ll see… take your best guess…

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